| Zombie Porn? |
| An expose. |
| Recently, a friend and I were discussing the many and varied forms of pornography available to consumers today. The subject of zombies came up (as it invariably does when I've been drinking) and we started to wonder...are zombies represented in the porn industry? Zombie Porn? I mean, ZOMBIE PORN? We have midgets, animals, amputees, circus freaks, pregnant women, the elderly, transvestites, transexuals, tri-psychosexuals (no, I don't know what those are either) and so on, but I'd yet to see any real evidence of the undead. (Now, I know what you're thinking, and plain ole vanilla necrophilia just doesn't count here. That's a whole 'nother sick and twisted ball game.). So, I decided to do some investigating. I figured that someone, somewhere, HAD to have a zombie fetish. Thanks to the internet's insidiuous mind poisoning, I have learned that someone, somewhere will have every fetish imaginable (from inflating celebrities to carrying sleeping women to Pickachu). So zombie porn? Natch. My search was preceded by a few base questions. For one, can zombies even have sex? They ARE dead, after all. No hormones. No blood circulation. Can they reproduce? Dead Alive/Brain Dead's Peter Jackson seems to think so. (Incidentally, as far as zombie porn goes? There's your Holy Grail, kids) However, sex is one thing that you don't see in most zombie movies, so who really knows. Also, do they WANT to have sex? Does anyone want to have sex with them? Do they want to have sex with each other, or more attractive, non-decomposing humans? So many questions! Hopefully, zombie porn would give me answers. First things first: putting the words "Zombie porn" into ANY search engine yields results that can strike terror into the bravest of hearts. I had no idea so many people wrote pornographic stories about Rob Zombie. Does his wife know? Zombie porn means a lot of things to a lot of people. Ahem. After sifting through this hellacious mess, I did find a very few films that qualified as zombie porn, albeit some a bit loosely...(PS...thanks to all the SA goons for their help! I love you all.) As much as I love zombie porn. ZOMBIE PORN! And...begin. PS: Yes, I do know about the photoshop variety of zombie porn. However, I'm not including it cause really, it's usually just regular porn someone (badly) photoshopped to look dead or zombie-like. Most of them just involve women with exposed entrails blowing some guy with greenish skin. Peh. If you're lookin for that, find it on your own. And yes, I have found some myself, but I probably won't be linking it. |
| Revenge of the GangBang Zombies |
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| This was one of the first movies I found, located at QueerHorror.com. It is evidentally a gay porn about men who get together and watch zombie porn. The movie is interspersed with scenes from the porn and then um...well, I suppose the actual porn. It's all very confusing and the description makes me want to go lie down, but it's bona fide zombie porn, complete with flesh eating and whatnot. This is not a movie I would be willing to see, even for the sake of research. Ok I lied. Anyone know where I can find a copy? Lemme know. GAY zombie porn. For their review, click HERE. Do it, maggot! |
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| This looks like a weird one, and it only just barely qualifies as zombie porn. It could probably more be termed "zombie movie with a lot of dirty sex in it". For a longer and far more interesting commentary than mine, click here to go to David Walker's review of the film. Bad zombie porn. (IMDB link) |
| I couldn't find a whole lot of information on this movie. It is evidentally about a whorehouse full of nymphomaniac zombies, and E! entertainmaint labels it a "cautionary tale". You know, no one ever had to tell me to be cautious of nympho zombies. Educational zombie porn. (IMDB link) |
| Yet another movie that was almost impossible to find information about. This movie is evidentally a porno version of Night of the Living Dead, even filmed in high contrast black and white like Romero's 1966 film. Now this would be worth watching. Well. Maybe if I'd been drinking. Er, more than usual. Once again? Tell me. But yeah, zombie porn. |
| Several people assisting in my search pointed to various lascivious love scenes in zombie movies, between zombies and zombies, zombies and humans, etc. It seems not just Peter Jackson believes in the love lives of the undead. The picture to the right is from the wildly terrible film The Dead Hate the Living, a very recent zombie movie in which there is a fake movie within a movie scene filmed in which a "zombie" kills a morgue attendendent and then they, you know. "Hug" for a bit. By hug I mean do it. That scene is not pictured; this one just LOOKS kind of sexual tension-y. Giggle...I saw this movie myself, and its not REALLY sexual tension-y. So why did I put it here? Shut up! That's why. (Thanks to TheNewFlesh for the picture!). FULL REVIEW COMING SOON I also recently saw Rob Zombie's movie, House of a Thousand Corpses. I thought MAYbe there'd be some zombie sex, but noooo, I was woefully misled by the title! Gypped, again. In so many ways, and if you've seen that movie, you know what I'm talkin 'bout. Thousand corpses my ass! I saw about 300. Hrmph. Actually no sex, either, but lots of gross leering and implied tthings. I recommend not seeing this movie, unless you enjoy being anally violated with a red hot corn cob. And I don't. So there you go. |
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| Short Disclaimer-I in no way am condoning this strange, sad fetish I've discovered, nor do I have an interest in said fetish. I certainly don't condone sex with zombies, as you are liable go get your brain eaten doing something like that. |
| Quick update: So, yeah, I saw this one, sort of by accident. My initial analysis was correct. AND the acting made even grown up Jesus cry. REVIEW COMING SOON |
| ALSO! Link to a Zombie Porn EZBoard! Have fun! Zombie porn! Again! I actually started this post, and there's some other movies mentioned in it. |
| Here is an INteresting article about a zombie-gore porn movie called Stethoscope. Hrm...gorn... |
| NEW NEW NEW!!! Zombie Pinup Girls! Mee-ow, baby!! Holy shit this rules. |
