And Jesus spake unto the donkey saying ”You’re double parked, my child,” to which the animal did not reply. And lo, Jesus sat in front of the donkey for fourteen days and fourteen nights citing parables and sermons and rebuking the animal for the sin of double parking. And the donkey would not repent. Being not of a violent nature, Jesus did verily continue with his gentle preaching until the Lord did intervene. He smote the donkey with a bolt from on high. Jesus asked ”Who art thou?” And the Lord spake unto him saying ”I am the Lord, I see all and know all!” Jesus asked ”Why have you destroyed the poor, wretched animal? Have you no mercy for his ignorant ways?” The Lord looked down upon Jesus, His left eye twitching ever so slightly, and in a thundering rage, He spoke ”The donkey was double parked!” Jesus replied ”Ah....” and went about his business I Ulricehamns skogar