The Reviews

Click on any description for the full text
The Title The Writer The Description
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A-C
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The AlchemistBrother RagnarokSilly demons and the guy from Parasite menace a girl, a wuss in a sweater, and a leftover from Manimal in The Alchemist.
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Alien PreyBrother RagnarokCat aliens plan an invasion of Earth and send the loveable Anders Anderson to get the lay of the land - and some lesbians - in Alien Prey.
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American NinjaBrother FistulaAll the 80's white-bread ninja action you can handle!
No more text, fool!
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Barn of the Blood LlamaBrother Ragnarok Barn of the Blood Llama. Hell yeah! This movie is a beautiful gem! We love you Kevin West!!!
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B-Fest 2002Brother Ragnarok
Brother Fistula
Brother Ferox
We finally got off our lazy asses, cashed in our change drawers, and drove to Chicago for B-Fest 2002. Thankfully, the city wasn't destroyed by the presence of our massive reviewing powers. Still, despite the lack of destruction, it was a hell of a good time.
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Bio-HazardBrother RagnarokHands up all who think a little kid wrapped in a garbage bag would make an effective monster. That's what I thought.
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The Blade MasterBrother Ragnarok Come hangglide with us to the land of Ator, in The Blade Master. If you don't have a hangglider, four-wheelers are welcome.
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Blood OrgyBrother Fistula Blood Orgy. Sounds cool, right? Probably not. H.G. Lewis is something else. Damn circus music.
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Brain DeadBrother Ragnarok Hey, wanna be confused? Go rent Brain Dead. It's a nice kinda confused, really. It's wack, j'all.
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Buried AliveBrother Ragnarok What can we say about Buried Alive? It sucks. We blacklisted it. Burn it in Hell.
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C.H.U.D.Brother Ragnarok The sewers of New York are overflowing with C.H.U.D.!
No more text, fool!
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Chupacabra, Legend of theBrother Ragnarok Troma used to impress Brother Ferox more than any other film company ever. Thanks for Chupacabra, Troma!
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Cthulhu MansionBrother Ragnarok Look at my nipple! Stay away from the Coke! Check out Cthulhu Mansion!
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D-G
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Dead AliveBrother Ragnarok This is one of the greatest movies ever made. Go out and get Dead Alive today. No, I mean, like, right now. Seriously. Do it.
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Death ShipBrother Ragnarok Death Shit...I mean Ship. Woof.
No more text, fool!
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DemonicusBrother FistulaSo, should you spend your hard earned cash on renting Demonicus? HELL NO! Use it for something good. Go buy a Clutch record.
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Educating RitaBrother Fistula Wanna educate yourself? Go read Everybody Poops. As for Educating Rita, fuck it. Use it to wipe your parrot's ass or something.
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Female Plasma SuckersBrother Ragnarok Foy bowled a 150. Female Plasma Suckers sucks arse.
No more text, fool!
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The GloveBrother Ragnarok The Glove. Starring John Saxon and Fat Albert or someone. Get it away. Banned. Yuck.
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H-M
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Happy Hell NightBrother Ragnarok Happy Hell Night is here! And you thought an annoying roommate was the worst thing about college!
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The House That VanishedBrother Ragnarok We feel it is our responsibility to warn everyone about The House That Vanished. This movie hurts. A lot.
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The Human FactorBrother Ragnarok The Human Factor. It chased us. We killed it. One more victory in the War Against Kennedy!
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InframanBrother Ragnarok Move over, Power Rangers, here comes Infra Man!!!
No more text, fool!
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The Invisible DeadBrother Ragnarok Unveiling the French's new secret weapon: stupid
movies about invisible monkey boys...
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Make Them Die SlowlyBrother Ragnarok Here's an interesting little piece of Italian cannibalism; Make Them Die Slowly. Banned in 31 countries. Check it out.
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ManiacBrother Fistula One of the more disappointing movie night flicks. Maniac wasn't all it was cracked up to be.
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Microwave MassacreBrother Ragnarok Ladies and gentlemen, take a look at what we know about our first review ever: Microwave Massacre!!
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N-Z
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Night Of The DemonBrother Ragnarok It's called Night of the Demon. You'd think there'd be demons in it, right? Think again.
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The PackBrother RagnarokEven fighting killer dogs, Joe Don can't leave the booze at home.
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Plan 9 from Outer SpaceBrother Fistula Ex-professional wrestler, titan of the horror genre, and overall sweetest Swedish dude that we know of - Tor Johnson shines in Plan 9 From Outer Space.
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Shaker RunBrother Ragnarok Pink Firebirds, deadly genetically engineered viruses, Leif Garrett, and beans. What more could a British scientist ask for? Perhaps to be in a better movie?
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Space MutinyBrother Ragnarok Peshak found a Nine Inch Nails disc that I had lost amongst my dad's discs [Meatloaf, Whitesnake, you know, cock rock]. Now read the review to Space Mutiny and SUFFER!!
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Split SecondBrother Ragnarok Grab a cup of coffee, some chocolate, and a big, big fucking gun, and sit back and enjoy Split Second. [Ferox's note: Ragnarok just might have dethroned me there for the title of Captain Comma]
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Star CrystalBrother Ragnarok Star Crystal. Crystal of the Staaaars! Well, that's what the song says. Go play some checkers.
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The Terror WithinBrother Ragnarok The Terror Within. Well, whatever.
No more text, fool!
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WerewolfBrother Fistula Even a man who is European at heart and says his prayers at night may become a bad werewolf costume when the wolfsbane blooms and the moon is full and bright.
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