Crazy Labels...
On a bag of chips:
"You could be a winner! No purchase necessary - details inside."
(the shoplifter special!)

On a bar of soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."

On a 'Swanson' frozen dinner:
"Serving Suggestions: Defrost."

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom)
"Do Not turn upside-down."
(Too Late!!)

On Mark and Spencer's Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."

On Packaging for a 'Rowenta' iron:
"Do not iron clothes while wearing them"
(But wouldn't that save me more time!?)

On Boot's children's cough medicine:
"Do not drive a car, or operate heavy machinery after use."
(we could save a lot of construction accidents if we could just get all those 5 year olds with head colds off the forklifts!)

On Nytol Sleeping Pills:
"Warning: may cause drowsiness."
(One would hope...)

On most brands of Christmas Lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what!!?)

On a Japanese Food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(ok now I'm curious!)

On Sainsbury's Peanuts:
"Warning: may contain traces of nuts."
(Talk about a newsflash!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3, Fly Qantas!)

On a childs superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop using hands or genitals"
(now where did THAT come from!!?"
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