Since I've gotten so many e-mails regarding the e-mails I mentioned and referenced in the Industry Joke, I've decided to post them here. There were actually two different e-mails that I know of so far, sent by someone from the same domain but a different address, and who sounds remarkably similar in both e-mails. I will cut and paste the contents of both e-mails, and the responses that Artemis and I did to our respective e-mails.

Meljean Brook

UPDATED 8/31/03: I've been banned! See below.

#1 (from shevoice@comicbooks.net, about a review that I did for "Another Sunday Dinner At Wayne Manor")

My Response:

Dear Review-Reviewer:

I'm sorry that you were not happy with my review. I'm afraid I don't understand why you are so upset with me -- I was simply doing exactly what you have done to me: reviewing a review. In that review, the person (who remained anonymous, so I could not respond directly to them) said, "Here's a better question, can anybody write a Bruce-Diana fic using Diana's actual personality and not this Mary Poppins in a Wonder Woman costume?" Considering that Wonder Woman has not had a distinct, stable personality in the comic books for several years now, I did not know exactly how that reviewer could determine that her 'actual' personality was NOT like Mary Poppins. In any case, I simply pointed out that the way in which Diana was written in "Another Sunday Dinner At Wayne Manner" was very un-like Mary Poppins.

But maybe I'm mistaken. Perhaps my memory of that film, and the books which inspired the film, are rather musty. If so, then forgive me.

But, since I have a certain memory of Mary Poppins that did not correspond with how Rick Peterson was writing Diana in the fanfic, I wrote my reply, "Diana is hardly a Mary Poppins in this story. Unless, of course, Mary Poppins suddenly started doing things that would make Walt Disney blush, but I'm sure that I never saw THAT version of the movie. And MP was never so blunt and truthful, which is part of your Diana that I find very refreshing."

Tell me again where I was incorrect? Diana is blunt and truthful in his story, and I do find that refreshing. Mary Poppins never had sex in her stories (although maybe she did in some fanfic -- hooray for fanfic). That reviewer did not address your obvious pet peeve "characterization by verbal tick", so I'm not sure why you are attacking me for addressing what I thought was an incorrect aspect of a review of the story -- the Mary Poppins issue.

I assume that by "verbal tick" you are referring to those fanfic writers who think that simply by writing "Great Hera" in Diana's dialogue they are nailing her personality, but the author of this story does not do that. He is very careful to make Diana say things other than "Great Hera" that reflect the way in which she has been portrayed in the current JLA comic, and, at times, her own book. Both she and Bruce SAY things in this story that are exactly what their writers in their comics (especially Joe Kelly) could have made them say.

And I do think that Rick Peterson is a good writer. That's my opinion. I may not have the same opinion as you, but you can feel free to write a rebuttal to my review on his review page.

As for the other charges you've laid at my feet, such as scaring away "industry insiders", I'm not sure if you are saying that my review is scaring them away, or if romance fics such as this and others are scaring them away. Either way, it doesn't matter, for several reasons. One, if any industry insider is interested in a certain author or story, then no review is going to change their mind. Two, if industry insiders are annoyed by romances, then they are obviously too stupid to avoid those fanfics which are clearly marked "romance" in the genre category. If what you say is true, that the romances are ruining chances for budding writers, then that is the fault of the industry insider who doesn't take the time to look at the genre before they read the story. Three, not every fanfic writer is a budding comic book writer. Some of them simply write for the joy of writing. Some of them eventually want to write horror, literary fiction, mystery, sci-fi, and yes (gasp!) even romance. To ban certain genres, then, because some "industry insider" finds them ludicrous, is ludicrous in itself. No one is forcing anyone to read anything at fanfiction.net.

And I fail to see how I am doing a disservice to the writers and the category (Batman) by supporting this story. I think this story is well written. The primary criticism I had of it was already addressed by a previous reviewer. The story is about Batman, which fits into the category requirements. There are no genre restrictions in that category (it is not no-romance-Batman, for example).

So it seems that the real issue here is that I happen to like Bruce/Diana romance stories, and you don't. But I don't have to troll through groups on Yahoo to read those stories, because that is what fanfiction.net is for -- Bruce/Diana pairings, and anything else fans want to write. The last I heard, fanfiction was for fans who want to explore possibilities between their favorite characters, practice their writing, and to have fun -- not simply as a vehicle for a career in the comic book industry. And not necessarily as a writing workshop, either. Some writers may use it that way, but not all. Some workshop their chapters ahead of time, and post it as a finished piece. I don't know what Rick Peterson does, but I'm fairly certain that he doesn't view my review as a disservice. If so, I'm certain he'll let me know. I'll send a copy of this to him, since your attached e-mail to me is a review, of sorts, of his story -- I wouldn't want him to miss the benefit of your infinite wisdom.

Happy Birthday to me ... it's not everyday someone tries to eviscerate me by e-mail,

Meljean Brook

And, #2, sent to Artemis1088 about her fanfiction, from georgigrrl@comicbooks.net:

And Artemis1088's reply (used without permission, but I hope she'll forgive me):

Thank you for taking the time to apparently read my stories, and then sharing your well thought out reply. Because if you did actually read my work, you would see that at least on a writing level, I feel my work is somewhat well written, despite the "controversial" subject matter. In fact, as someone who does read much of what is posted in the DC Superheroes category, and as someone with a degree in Literature, the "shipfics" tend to be among the better written.

What in my writing, since you singled me out, is so awful? Even the subject matter, in this case a relationship between Batman and Wonder Woman has been touched upon by Elseworlds titles and even in the current story arc of the JLA, culminating in #90.

If this was truly detrimental to DC, they could threaten litigation against us, these horrible people who insist on taking our fetishisms out of the yahoo closet. Hm, so why don't they? My guess would be sales. I have had a number of people inquire about issues they've seen me reference in my fanfiction, as well as in scans. And some of those individuals have written back that they bought either the back issue, or the TPB.

On the animated series, which is what I actually set most of my work in, an innocent kiss in the first season led to so much interest that the producers of the show decided to make a possible Batman and Diana relationship hinted at, even changing a scene in "Twilight," the first episode of Season 2. The Martian Manhunter was supposed to accompany Wonder Woman to New Genesis, but it was changed to Batman instead. And this isn't the wishful thinking of a "shipper," but what Bruce Timm admitted in interviews before the premiere of season 2.

As far the "joke" in the industry, besides the points I made above, DC doesn't even accept written submissions, only artwork. What shipper's fanfic is posted, is mentioned as "romance," somewhere on the category. In other words, I doubt your information, that we are somehow hurting the more so-called serious writers in DC Superheroes, when their work is easily distinguished from ours by summary alone.

And finally, a word about "ship" in general: it exists in every fandom. The word itself originated among X-File fans, but the idea of fans wanting to see certain characters have a romantic relationship is hardly new, and hardly unique to either the DC Superheroes subcategory of ff.net Comics or the comics industry. To single out a subcategory of ff.net is, quite frankly, ridiculous.

Artemis

If the e-mailer had simply railed on me for contradicting another review, that would have been fine. But she added a few things that made me suspect that it was as much an issue of the Bruce/Diana pairing as the quality of writing -- One, she accused me of granting "blanket acceptance" to a story simply because I liked the pairing, and ended with that sweet little remark about trolling for Diana/Bruce stories (two personal attacks just because I'm a shipper?). Second, Rick Peterson has a really wonderful writing style. I've also commented on his non-romance fics, and loved them ("The Ring", "Strange Behavior") If she had actually bothered to read the story, then she would have known that he wasn't characterizing by verbal tick, his writing was impeccable, and the story was engaging (if not to everyone's taste.) Third, I write Bruce/Diana fics myself, which she would have realized when looking up my e-mail from my profile. How else would she know that I "go trolling" for Bruce/Diana pics, and just happen to like the pairing? It seemed to me like she was taking out some of her anger and disgust over the pairing on me.

Then, when Artemis showed me her e-mail, it became pretty obvious that the e-mailer was simply targeting the Bruce/Diana fics -- the language about going to Yahoo groups for the pairing was similar, and the accusations of bad writing once again didn't hold water. Artemis is also a fine writer, whether she's writing comedy, drama or romance.

Do industry insiders consider DC romance fanfic a joke? I don't know, and frankly, don't care. I suspect that even if they do, we romance writers aren't ruining any other writer's chances of being noticed by DC. One thing that I do know about these romance writers, though, is that we have a wonderful sense of humor. We don't take the pairing all that seriously (we really like the idea, but, jeez, we're talking about a man in tights getting it on with a woman in star spangled panties) We often laugh at ourselves because of the ridiculousness of it sometimes -- but we do take the art of writing seriously. Very, very seriously.

I have no idea who this e-mailer is, or why she chose to attack Artemis and myself (and by extension Rick Peterson) while on her personal crusade -- I think her time would have been much better served, however, by reviewing and critiquing those writers whom she says have potential. Because she's right: no, not every romance fic is a good fic, nor is every one well-written, and even I'm not convinced at some fanfics pairing up Bruce and Diana. (And I have even (gasp!) liked and given positive reviews to stories where Bruce and Diana were involved with other people, and for fics that have no romance at all.)

I just hope that she doesn't tell them to give up what they are doing if they are writing romance, or anything else that she doesn't like. I hope that she encourages them instead of bemoaning their chosen genre. And I hope that she doesn't give them the impression that being noticed by DC is the only reason to write fanfiction.

So why did I write "The Industry Joke"? Frankly, I was afraid that this person was sending out e-mails to other writers besides Artemis and me; perhaps even writers who took her seriously and felt that their work was not welcomed or wanted at fanfiction.net. I thought the e-mails unfair and unwarranted, and felt it was a humorous way to address them -- because they needed to be addressed. I wanted to bring it out into the open, so that if someone did receive such an e-mail, they would know that they didn't have to take it seriously. And, since the supposed accusation was of bad writing, I wanted to write a story that was REALLY bad, characterizations by verbal tick and all.

8/31/03

Well, I've received another e-mail, and had my "Industry Joke" story removed from fanfiction.net and temporarily banned, because it wasn't a real "story". So, just because I'm a contrary type of person, I've posted it here: "The Industry Joke: The Ultimate DC Romance".

Ah, and the new e-mail. View, my friends! Come feel the love!

From Pam at redgoldmask@jlafans.com:

And my response:

Dear Pam,

It's unfortunate that there are people who will stoop to rude, unjustified insults and ad hominem attacks just because they happen to dislike an idea that the other person likes.

And I'm sorry that you feel the need to be such a person.

As I've said before, I'm not really interested in whether or not DC considers Bruce/Diana shippers "a joke". I don't write my stories for DC; I write them for anyone who wants to read them, and be entertained by them. And, though you may not like to hear it, the truth is that hundreds of people have been entertained by my stories. I may not have convinced them that a Bruce/Diana matchup is possible, but that was never my goal -- writing good stories was, and I've achieved that. Hundreds more people have been entertained by the other writers who write Bruce/Diana fanfics, and thousands more by romance fics in general.

What I consider the industry joke is the fans who think that their version of Batman, or Wonder Woman, or the JLA is the only viable version out there, and who insist on insulting, attacking, and trying to degrade the character of anyone who disagrees with their version of the comic books.

You claim that "Somebody made the mistake of thinking you were adult enough to understand or care that you're an embarrassment to JLA fans. That we can't wait until November when the idiocy ends and we can buy our favorite title again." What you fail to realize, however, is that my fans are also JLA fans. I am a JLA fan, and have been for many, many years. I may be an embarrassment to you, but I'm hardly so to every fan of JLA. And I hate to point this out, but if you have been abstaining from buying your favorite title, then it obviously isn't much of a favorite anymore, only the memory of a favorite -- not to mention that since JLA is DC's #2 best-seller after the Hush storyline, that the dollars you've been withholding until November have hardly made a difference in JLA sales ranking. There is always going to a large group of people who don't like the current creative team: it looks like it was your turn, this time around. Better luck next time.

And, if DC thought that the pairing was such a joke, I doubt Joe Kelly would have gotten it past the editors (although I should let you know that it wasn't even Joe Kelly that got the shippers writing about Bruce/Diana -- several fics were written long before he got onto the comic, so you can hardly count on the fanfic insanity ending in November. Sorry.)

In any case, I find it sad that you want to stifle the creativity of anyone just because you don't like the pairing and consider it a joke. Good for you; I think it is very Nazi-ish, but I suppose if you find enjoyment in it, you're entitled to it.

I'm just glad that I could provide you so much fun and entertainment every Wednesday at the comic book store. Since my one goal as a writer is to entertain, I'm pleased to know that I've made you a fan of mine, in a way. I'm not certain how one day a week at the comic store makes you a spokesperson for the industry, but it would be churlish of me to point that out, wouldn't it? Yes, I think it would. In any case, I've never taken myself very seriously, so I'm thrilled to know that you DO take me so seriously that you have such a need to write an e-mail like you did. My best fans always send e-mails, so, thanks!

And, to answer your so-cleverly-worded parting demand to "shut the hell up": NO.

I don't think that I will.

Meljean Brook,

Josephine,

Ugly-Girl

&500 other names.

Will there be more to come? I'm beginning to hope so. I have to admit that this e-mail left me sick to my stomach as much as it made me angry and incredulous--and made me laugh. What kind of person writes someone else and says things like this? It is one thing to say, "Hey, we don't like Bruce/Diana fics, and we can't wait 'til this is over" but rudeness? Ridiculous insults? Where do these people get off (besides all over their pinups of Catwoman?)

Um, sorry, couldn't resist.

Also, I'm not exactly sure how I made a "spectacle" of myself, unless writing "The Industry Joke" is akin to running down the main streets of Portland stark naked (and after having my baby, that wouldn't exactly be a thrilling sight). It was honestly the only way I could think of to address this issue (especially since my reply was never answered via e-mail) which I thought was pretty serious. I don't like the idea of people trying to humiliate authors and telling them to stop their writing just because they don't agree with what is being written -- that sounds too much like censorship and creative dampening, and we've got enough of that going around already.

And where in the world did she get the idea I have 500 names? I've been very open about my aliases, which I change depending on the style of writing I want to do. Sheesh. Stephen King does it. Nora Roberts does it. I can't even imagine trying to remember the passwords to that many aliases to review myself in order to create "fans". That would mean that I alone would make up half the readership of the DC fanfic. Hehehe…although I wouldn't mind saying that I'm Adrian Tullberg.

Damn that hilarious, talented bastard, wherever he is. J