DUMPSTER DIVING

by

Jera

Disclaimers and warnings: The characters are purely fictional and the story is intended merely for the entertainment of the readers. Don’t read this story if you’re squeamish about trash or difficult domestic situations.

Billy’s arm hung out the window of his pickup truck and the hot humid air swirled across his face. His hair was damp and he occasionally mopped his brow with the back of his hand. It was a perfect day for fishing…that’s what he had told the guys when he headed out toward home. Lucky for them all that the water heater had sprung a gas leak – a bad one. The County boys couldn’t get at it right away so the boss closed the shop for the rest of the day. Some kind of luck, huh? Almost a whole day off and here it was only Wednesday and everything.

Billy had already begun planning his unexpected day off. He’d head home, change, and then over to the lake for some fishing. Yep, a fishing pole and a six pack of cool ones…heaven right here, right now and best of all no Bonnie. Yeah, she wouldn’t be home till five thirty or if he was lucky maybe later. No Bonnie. He slapped the side of his truck with glee.

Billy married Bonnie when she was 16. He had been 21 at the time and was considered a good catch. At least that’s what Bonnie’s old man had told him. Naturally Billy agreed. Bonnie still had that baby fat, sure she was pretty enough, but after two years of marriage Billy was restless and rapidly growing tired of little Bonnie. A man needs some freedom and that girl follows me around like a lost dog. Funny how Billy could put on twenty pounds, he had already been on the heavy side, but it was Bonnie who was fat. He was thinking about that new girl at Bobby’s Pockets when he turned onto the dirt road that led to trailer where they lived.

"Damn." Billy said out loud when he saw Bonnie’s old rust colored 86 LTD station wagon parked out front.

"Oh well, might get me a little for I head out." Billy told himself. He was laughing about it when he walked up the steps. She probably came home for lunch or something.

Bonnie wasn’t in the kitchen or living room so Billy sneaked toward the bedroom. Thought he’d surprise her by just popping in. Yes that’s what he thought. But it was Bonnie that surprised Billy that hot August day. He looked into the bedroom - It was dark. Someone was moving around on the bed. The lights were off and Billy heard voices. That’s right voices. Something wasn’t right but Billy couldn’t figure out quite what it was. He stepped into the darkened room and by the dim light that was filtering through the blinds he saw them.

Billy stopped in his tracks, as still as a statue, while thoughts and emotions began to boil inside him. The recognition of what he was looking at hit him full throttle and he began to move into action. His rage propelled him across the room. It was then that they finally heard him. Bonnie looked up from where she lay and started to say something but Billy wasn’t listening. The other woman sat astride Bonnie with both her hands on Bonnie’s naked breasts. Billy lashed out at the stranger.

"Get off her you pervert." He bellowed.

His punch caught her on the shoulder and she fell off the bed and disappeared momentarily. Billy’s wrath turned on Bonnie.

"You slut, you whore, you disgusting pig." He shouted as he dragged her off the bed by her hair.

She hung limply in his grasp. He began to slap her across the face as hard as he could. Bonnie screamed his name over and over while Billy beat her. Suddenly he found himself holding the baseball bat that he kept by the bed for protection. He didn’t think about picking it up. It just seemed to be there in his hand. And then he found himself standing over Bonnie holding the bat.

"I’m gonna kill ya, I’m gonna kill ya." Billy snarled through clenched teeth.

Bonnie crouched at his feet looking up helplessly, cowering like a wiped dog.

Someone pushed him and he stumbled back a step. It was that Henderson girl. The one down here cause of that trouble with the law back in Maryland.

"Leave her alone!" The girl shouted at him.

Billy looked at her through eyes glazed over with rage. For some reason he found himself thinking - nice tits. God, she’s got a nipple ring ... man this one’s not fat.

He wanted to look, he really wanted to look but instead he heard himself saying "Your ass is mine bitch."

He growled, a guttural animal like growl, and then he started lifting the bat to swing at her. Some how she hit him, hit him right in the throat, a straight punch. Billy never saw it coming. But he felt the pain and then he felt the sudden panic that followed when he realized that he couldn’t breathe. He dropped the bat and grabbed his throat. No air he thought. Can’t breathe his mind screamed. Billy made strange gagging sounds as he struggled for air.

He was in a blind panic and things seemed to be closing in on him. He staggered back a few steps but he didn’t see Bonnie who had started to crawl away. He tripped over her and fell backwards. Billy saw the ceiling and with one hand he reached back trying to break his fall but it was too late. His head hit the dresser. Billy was a big man and he hit the dresser hard…all his weight…right on the corner. The large mirror fell back against the wall but didn’t break. The change jar fell over spilling pennies, nickels and a few dimes across the dresser. Some of the coins rolled off the dresser and fell onto Billy’s work shirt, the blue one with his name over the pocket. Bonnie had ironed it last night and the crisply starched shirt now looked oddly wrinkled as Billy slid downward. Billy lay motionless on the floor, blood slowly soaking into the dirty yellow carpet, one hand still on his throat and his mouth ajar. Billy’s eyes were closed and the trailer was suddenly silent.

"God, you kilt him Rae." Bonnie’s trembling voice broke the silence. "What are we gonna do?"

Rae was dressing hurriedly. "I’ve got to go." She said grimly.

Bonnie was on her feet. She grabbed Rae’s arm. "Take me…I want to go with you." She pleaded.

"They’ll be after me." Rae said firmly.

There was a funny look in her eyes but all Bonnie could think about was going with Rae. "I gotta go with you…I gotta, please Rae." Bonnie continued tears beginning to flow again.

Bonnie tossed what she could into Billy’s camping backpack and fished the money she had hidden out of the coffee canister. She had taken the tent, camp stove, and all the food in the pantry. Rae was already starting the Ford when Bonnie took one last look at the trailer that had been her home these last two years. She wasn’t sorry to be leaving and she surely wouldn’t miss Billy but Bonnie never wanted it to end like this. She shuddered inwardly when she looked at Billy again. He really meant to kill me she thought. Probably Rae too. But he’s dead now and no one will ever believe us. She left her wedding ring on the dresser and didn’t look back when Rae drove down the dirt road for the last time.

They stopped by Rae’s uncle’s house. Rae’s folks had sent her there to get her away from the bad influences of Baltimore. Here in this small southern town they were sure that Rae would find her way. Rae couldn’t think about her parents, and she didn’t want to see her aunt so she went in the back way and sneaked up stairs. She took her suitcase and boots. She got the sleeping bag from the garage and they were gone.

Three years had passed since that day and neither one of them had ever spoken about it again. Bonnie had lost all the baby fat that had bothered Billy so much. She wasn’t the same person she had been, neither one of them was. Bonnie Rae Johnson was almost two and a half now. Yes they named her Bonnie Rea and where they got that name was no mystery. Johnson – that was another matter all together. She was named after some dental floss. They all were for that matter. They were sisters. Different mothers, but sisters just the same. At least that’s what they told anyone who asked but not many asked and even fewer cared about two girls alone with a baby. The Johnson sisters and their baby headed north for a while then drove east.

It was fall and winter was coming on them fast. Another long cold winter lay ahead. Virginia would have to be their home for a while. The Johnson girls had had a run of bad luck and were completely out of everything. They had been living in the car so long it had become home to all of them. Bonnie Rae or little Rae Rae as she was affectionately called had really only known the LTD as home. They had stayed in shelters often during last winter. But that was in Pennsylvania and it was cold there. Virginia wouldn’t be as bad. They had camped most of the summer and Rae had picked up odd jobs here and there. Rae was working again after what seemed like an eternity. There were no shelters, congregate meal centers, nothing really in this small town to help them through the hard times. Bonnie got to know all the store people. She knew when the Winn Dixie manager put the stale bread out, she knew when the outdated milk went on the loading dock, and she knew when the every dumpster in every apartment complex and trailer court in town was emptied. She knew it all because she visited them all religiously to recover the eatable, sellable, and usable items or treasures as she called them. She’d done it before and she figured she’d do it again…just part of getting by. Rae didn’t know what she been doing all day while she walked from place to place looking for work. And to her shame she did nothing to stop her when she finally did realize how her Bonnie spent her days. Rae Rae sat sleepily in her plastic chair while Mommie went dumpster diving…yeah that’s what she did…and that’s what kept them going those two months until Rea got that job at the sewing plant.

Betty Wilson had befriended Rae and when she met Bonnie and little Rae Rae she had instantly taken a liking to them. She was the personnel clerk at the plant. She had been the first person to see the tall young woman who showed up one day to apply for a job. There were no openings on the line but something about the girl had made Betty go out on a limb.

"Come back this afternoon and we’ll see what we can do." She had told her.

It had been 9:30 in the morning when she watched Rae walk out her office door. She made some calls and by ten she had something for her. Not on the line, just a sweep up job, but it was a start and she’d be able to move up when something opened. She wasn’t sure why she had taken the time round something for this girl. Maybe it as the look in her eyes. Maybe it was the way she walked. Whatever it had been Betty put her out of her mind for now and continued with other matters until lunch. She started out toward the parking lot to get her car. Betty was planning to go over to Wendy’s to pick up some lunch.

There she sat. The girl sat alone under a tree just outside the parking lot patiently waiting. Waiting to come back. Then it hit her, she had walked all the way out here from town.

Betty honked the horn. "I’ve got something for you." She said cheerfully. Betty would never forget the smile on the girl’s face when she told her that she started tomorrow. Rae stood beside the car. "See you tomorrow morning."

Betty had been unable to talk her into having lunch but at least she had accepted a ride back to town.

Rae did get the job on the line and soon Betty and the others had gown to be very fond of her. They all loved to see her sister and little Rae Rae drive up after work. Betty had them over once for a cookout. She and her husband liked the girls. Rae Rae was such a cute kid. Bonnie had been taking her to the library most days while Rae was at work. Very educational she had explained. Mom and daughter were learning. They had computers there too and Bonnie was learning to use one. She never had the chance in school and later well later it was Billy, laundry, work, Billy, cooking, Billy, cleaning, Billy, TV and more Billy. Bonnie was sixteen when she married and she never had finished school. She wanted to finish high school. Rae Rae would. Bonnie promised herself that no matter what happened Rae Rae would finish high school and maybe more if things worked out. But Bonnie didn’t tell all that to Betty. She really didn’t like to tell anyone anything about herself. Her old life was gone – behind her – dead - and dead things are best left alone. Rae had left an old life behind too. One that Bonnie could only guess about. She had seen bits and pieces of it but it lay in the dark recesses of Rae’s past and Bonnie hoped that that’s where it would remain.

That time in Johnstown. When Rae Rae was sick. She had a fever. She was coughing and she looked so pathetic. Bonnie was afraid. Her little girl was sick and they were broke. No where to get help. Rae left them in the parked car and went into the Shop & Save. It seemed like an eternity but when she came out she got in and drove away quickly. She had reached into the pocked of her coat and pulled out children’s cough medicine, children’s Tylenol, and chewable vitamins. This wasn’t the first time she’d shop lifted when they needed something. Bonnie didn’t say anything then – she was so thankful to have the medicine for Rae Rae but later they had the worst fight they’d ever had.

"Don’t you ever do that again." She yelled.

"At least I don’t crawl around in those fucking dumpsters." Rae screamed back at her.

"Don’t say that in front of the baby." Bonnie retorted.

Rae stormed off leaving them sitting alone in the LTD for almost a half an hour. Bonnie wanted to run after her almost as soon as she had left but they waited. Bonnie had never been so thankful to see anyone in her life. She knew it was Rae the moment she rounded the corner and started down the block. Bonnie grabbed Rae Rae and ran up to meet her.

"I’m sorry." She said hugging Rae.

"Me too." Rae mumbled.

Back in the car Bonnie began to cry. "We need you…if you get in trouble again they’ll find out about…you know…we might lose you…we can’t live without you…I can’t live without you." Rae promised to be a straight arrow and so far she’d been true to her word. But they didn’t talk about that part of their lives either. No, they talked about Rae Rae, what she said, what she did, what she liked to eat, and which stories she liked best.

Betty noticed how much Rae Rae liked to eat. The girls too for that matter. She was glad to have them there.

Betty knew something was up but this was worse then she had expected. All her friends, all those lives thrown into turmoil. The she thought of Rae, Bonnie and little Rae Rae. What are they going to do now? What a way to start the week Betty thought.

Bonnie pulled into the parking lot. She and Rae Rae had spent the day at the library again. Rae should be out any minute now. The men and women began to pour out into the parking lot. No smiles today she remembered thinking. A few waved but no one stopped to speak. Rae got in quietly. Bonnie started the car.

"They’re closing the plant." Rae said.

Bonnie turned off the engine and looked up at Rae. "What?"

"Next month…they gave us a month’s notice." Rae shook her head. "Well it was good while it lasted…let’s go girl."

They didn’t talk much at first. Rae Rae chatted on and on about Big Bird and Cookie Monster.

That night they began to make their plans. Nothing to do but head but again and see where the road led them. Bonnie slept poorly that night. The three of them cuddled on the sleeping bags in the back of the LTD but sleep just wouldn’t come. She had been having a dream lately. The dream had grown more real each day. She had seen Rae Rae playing in a yard. She and Rae were sitting on a porch watching her. Bonnie wanted a home for Rae Rae. A place for her to grow up like other kids, where she could feel secure, go to school, and be safe. Tonight she couldn’t see that dream anymore. Bonnie was afraid.

Betty had stopped Rae at lunch. "You guys come over tonight, okay. Got something to talk about." That’s all she’d said but Rae told her sure, so there they were driving up to Betty’s house. Bonnie was nervous and Rae was in a serious mood. Only Rae Rae seemed to be glad to be going to Betty’s. She talked on and on about TV, food, and seeing Betty. Then they were there.

Bonnie cried after they had done it. The LTD had been their home for so long she had begun to think of it as part of the family. Rae had spent more hours tinkering with it then Bonnie could even hazard a guess. It had to be done but Bonnie didn’t have to like it. Rae had sold the tools and most of the camping things already but until now it didn’t seem so final. They had really done it and there was no going back. Rae squeezed her hand as they walked away.

"It couldn’t have made it." She said almost to herself. Rae was right but Bonnie still hated what they had done.

Betty was waiting in her car. Rae Rae sat in the back seat watching the two forlorn women returning. She watched a strange man drive the LTD behind the building. She didn’t understand why someone was driving it away.

Bonnie sat alone in the Atlanta Greyhound station. The ride from Virginia had seemed so unreal. A jumble of confusing thoughts rushed thorough her mind. Betty’s brother was going to let them work for him at his motel in Tucson. They could live there too. It seemed like an answer to their prayers but still she wasn’t sure.

Rae Rae jumped up on the bench next to her. "Got French Fries!" She exclaimed excitedly.

Bonnie stared numbly at the sack of fries her daughter was holding. Rae sat down next to her. Bonnie was remembering the times they had listened to the radio and sung along together while Rae Rae rocked in her car seat and the miles melted away.

"We sold our music." She said her voice trembling. Rae put her arm around Bonnie.

"We’ll be all right. It’ll be good." She said comfortingly.

"I know…motels have pools, maybe Rae Rae can learn to swim." Bonnie said with just the slightest hint of a hopeful smile.

The three sat in silence waiting for the bus. Rae Rae munched contentedly on the fries. Rae rubbed the little girl’s head absent-mindedly and thought about Arizona. Bonnie’s mind was traveling too…she had begun to dream again. She thought she saw Rae Rae playing beside a swimming pool, bright sunshine streaming down on her, while she and Rae sat watching. Bonnie smiled.

Billy was tired and he sat down hard on the couch. He put his feet up on the coffee table and wished he had a cold beer. So damn hot today. God, I must have sweated off ten pounds. He thought.

"Get yer feet off the table." Janice’s shrill voice sat him up straight.

Billy got up and started for the shower.

"Don’t – it’ll wake the baby." Janice scolded.

Billy sat alone on the steps of the trailer looking at his truck. Why’d I marry her anyway? He wondered. Shit, the sheriff’s daughter… and I work for her old man. She sure seemed different after I got that divorce from Bonnie. Billy thought about Bonnie. Never told anyone what had happened, just said she’d run off…her and that other girl.

"Get in here Billy, the baby’s crying."

"Okay Babe." Damn, I wish I could get away with having a beer.

No, Billy didn’t die that day in the bedroom. He was dying though - much more slowly and he was just beginning to realize it.

Jera