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The room was silent for a moment. No one really knew what to say. Lexi was still waiting for an answer. Nick was waiting to see what Brian was going to say all the while keeping a close eye on Faith. Brian’s mind was spiraling out of control. Faith, meanwhile, was letting her heart chip a little further. She was a fool to think that he would be around longer. She was even more a fool to think that he would tell her of such news. She took a deep breath. “So you leave tomorrow?” Her voice was shaky, her heart was crumbling and any hope she had was FAR gone. Brian’s eyes raised to meet Faith’s and he shook his head. “Yeah, yeah I am. I meant to tell you…” he started but Lexi tugged on his sleeve. “Daddy, you didn’t answer my question… when do I get to go on the plane? I miss Uncle J, Howie and Kevin!” Brian’s eyes never faltered from Faith’s when he answered, noting when
Faith’s eyes closed. She had felt something too, that much he was sure.
He was also sure any chance was gone.
Faith felt she was over reacting, plain and simple. She had only known him for two weeks he owed her nothing. She was just being a silly girl, probably a silly fan. Brian was painfully aware that the light he had seen in her eyes earlier on in the kitchen was clouded over. Clouded over, with what probably was another wall to block him from getting to close to her. “Well, how about me and you go get some ice cream kiddo.” Nick said picking up his plate and grabbing Lexi’s too. “Can I daddy?” she asked pitifully. Brian looked down at his little angel and nodded. He would thank Nick later for taking giving him some time alone with Faith. He would owe the man a lot. Faith stayed quiet as she cleared the table. Brian stayed seated at the dining room table. When she came in to collect the butter and salt and pepper she was startled when he grabbed her arm. “I was going to tell you, tonight. I wanted to tell you when I found out. I had actually called, but you were studying.” He explained, hoping she understood. “You owe me no explanation Brian.” Faith responded softly and brushed a stray piece of hair from her face. He pulled on her hand until she took the seat next to him. “That’s where I think your wrong.” She glanced up to meet his gaze, but quickly looked back down. “Brian, this is being blown out of proportion.” “Is it?” She looked up again and this time kept his gaze. “Yeah it is. You’re a famous singer. Of course you’ll be away. I knew that all along. It has been two weeks Brian, I have NO hold on you.” He didn’t know whether to laugh at that comment or literally cry at it. How could she be so blind to see how HE felt? “You’re so wrong Faith, so wrong.” She shook her head and her eyebrows knitted together. “About what?” He let her hand go and let his gentle hands tip her chin up. Gently, ever so gently he ran the tips of his fingers over her cheeks and down to the other side. Her skin was silky smooth under his fingertips, as he knew it would be. His mind reeled with thoughts that didn’t pertain to the situation at hand. e wasn’t blind to how beautiful she was. He was very aware of how sexy she was, the fact that she didn’t know it, made him all the more hungry with desire. This was a serious situation and all he wanted was to know her heart, but to know her body also. Animalistic cravings coursed through him. Just from touching her soft, angelic face, the possibilities were endless. “Your wrong because” his words were husky. The heat, the heat must have been getting to him. SHE was getting to him. “You’re wrong because, you have a strong hold on me. Such a strong, strong hold. Breathtaking almost…” His words were mere whispers, but she heard him loud and clear. Her senses were already heightened with his touch, let alone the words. “Brian…” she protested. “Faith, you didn’t see it, because you were so worried I thought you were a fool, or a dork as you put it. “ he added with a smile. “ You don’t see it, because you don’t see you like I see you.” She shook her head, and in that motion shook his fingers off. “Brian, I don’t like games. I can’t handle this..” “So you admit it.” “Admit what?” she asked more than confused. “There is an it, there is something here.” She shook her head and stood up. “Don’t do this Brian. There is nothing going on, we’re friends right? I mean I’m not so naïve to think we weren’t even friends. But that’s it.” “Faith.” “No, Brian listen to me, there is nothing to discuss. You are going back on tour, I’ll see you when you get to Kentucky. I’m not offended or hurt that you didn’t tell me. You’re a busy guy, I wouldn’t expect you to keep me updated all the time. As long as we keep in touch I’m more than cool.” “Don’t do this Faith.” He said shaking his head. The walls, they were being built even higher. “I’m just stating the truth.” “You know that’s a lie.” “Fine, Brian what do you want me to say? I wish you weren’t leaving already? You should know that… but if you didn’t, I wish you weren’t and I will miss you.” “Faith, please…” he was pleading, begging for her to see what he was so sure was in his eyes. “Brian..” “This is more than….” “That?” she added with a chuckle. Jokes, they would take her mind off the situation at hand. “Faith, there IS something here. I mean beyond friendship, please, open your eyes.” “Brian, come on now…. It’s just the heat talking. I promise you I’m
cool with this.” Why couldn’t
“Dammit Faith! It’s NOT the heat, but I’m certainly not going to sit here and say I haven’t been thinking about how good you look right now. I’m not going to lie and say I’m not extremely attracted to you. I won’t sit here and say you don’t make me crazy, when I’m dizzy from you! I don’t know what to say to get you to SEE!” She was stunned so much so she fell back on her couch and let the words soak in. “I see it alright Brian, but it’s just the heat.” “Pathetic excuse Faith. You’re just saying crap like that because your afraid. Why can you tell Nick your afraid and you can’t even tell me!” She stood up at his words and threw her hands in the air. “FINE BRIAN! Fine, you make me crazy! At first I was so nervous around you complete sentences wouldn’t come out. Then I was comfortable, finally. It was like I could finally breathe around you, you know? Everyone.. EVERYONE kept saying ‘Oh Faithy’s got it bad for Brian.’ I don’t, ok? I think you’re an amazing guy, but I’m petrified, petrified that your going to break my heart. I’m just a fan Brian. Just a FAN.” She whispered the end as tears came to her eyes. He sat silenced a moment before standing up. “You don’t get it do you? Your NOT just a fan Faith. You from the first time you came into contact with my family have opened your arms. Not anyone would have done that! If you were that FAN you would have been screaming with the rest of them!” She huffed and stood up with a growl. “Don’t you dare make all fans out to be screaming maniacs! We DO have hearts Brian, and common sense. Take it as a fucking compliment!” She snapped. It was one thing to be talking about her, but insinuating that all their fans were crazy and not thinking about his privacy irked her. “Christ Faith, calm down! I don’t want to fight with you, ok? I’m just trying to point out that your MORE than a fan! You generally saved MY daughter from a very dangerous position. I’m not saying our fans are crazy, I’m saying they can be a bit much at times. You ensured her and my mothers safety. That one move alone, is enough to make you MORE than a fan!” He exclaimed running a hand through his hair. “Fine, I’m more than a fan. Brian, this conversation has gotten completely out of hand, completely out of hand. I don’t even remember what we were arguing about!” His features softened as he moved to the couch. “I’m trying to talk to you, trying to tell you that you’re more than a fan. And as much as it scares ME, I’m very interested in what could happen if you were more than a friend.” His words rendered her still. He was leaving tomorrow, but he wanted to be more than friends? Flashes upon flashes of all her teeny moments came before her eyes before she raised her head to meet his gaze. She shook her head and walked to the recliner. “Brian, I just…this is too much…” He sighed. “I’m not saying I’m in love with you, but I am certainly as hell not going to stand here and say I’m not the least bit interested in what could happen. I’m not leaving tomorrow with out you knowing, you deserve that much Faith. I’m not saying I think we could last past four days, but I am saying everything in me is dying to know. You’ve been hurt, I’ve been hurt Faith, we can help each other.” She closed her eyes and held back the tears. He didn’t know what real pain was, not like she did. “Brian, I know your not saying you’re in love with me. I’m just.. I… can’t” she whispered closing her eyes again this time letting a solitary tear fall. He stood up and made his way to her quickly. “Yes, you can Faith. Because, no matter what, I’m going to help you through this, whether I be your friend or more. But I need you to know, I want you to know, everything in me tells me to be more.” The last words were whispered and not a moment later his arms were wrapped tightly around her. She pulled back moments later and gently pushed him away. “I’m fine” she called over her shoulder when he asked where she was going. Quickly very quickly she made her way to the
small balcony. Anything to dry her eyes. She was embarrassed
he had gotten to her. He had spoken with such compassion she was
floored. He was promising her things many guys before him had, and
she was afraid he would eventually become them. He was her perfect
man for so long, in her dreams since her teens, and now he wanted to be
the ACTUAL man in her life. He had told her not forever, she knew
that. He told her he didn’t love her now, she knew that. He wanted
her, she couldn’t handle that. If he only knew the broken soul she was.
If he only knew the pain that had chipped away at much more than her heart.
Sure she was goofy Faith, but there was Faith hardly anyone saw.
Brian was her threat of being discovered. She looked at him and knew
he could see straight through her, even into her, and it scared her to
wits end.
“Brian, I’m really afraid” she whispered squeezing his forearms bringing him closer to her. “Me too, Faith. But, I’m willing, just a little bit at a time.” He whispered to her softly. She was beyond startled when she felt his tears on her neck. She turned quickly and wrapped her arms around him tightly. It was much more than a hug and so much was spoken through the hug. “Just a little bit at a time?” she asked again, this time against his neck. An involuntary shiver ran down his spine as her breath softly brushed against his hot skin. She was tight against him and it felt like heaven to him. “I promise that Faith. I also promise that no matter what I’m gonna need you around.” She bit her lip and softly kissed his earlobe. Fully knowing the effect she was going to have on him. Growling he pulled back and raised an eyebrow at her. “This is the part where I’m supposed to get the clue and kiss you, right?” he asked waggling his eyebrows at her. “I suppose” she purred. One of his hands softly rubbed her cheek, while the other pulled her even closer to him. She closed her eyes to the contact and kept her arms wrapped around his shoulders. “If there’s one thing I need you to know…” he whispered. “Uh huh?” she asked in a breath as his hand started to outline circles on her back. “Your just as magical to me as I apparently am to you” He was closer, so close she could feel his lips barely brushing against hers. His hand pulled her lips gently to his and softly, ever so softly like a feather falling he let his lips caress hers. She was dying, the heat of the weather, the fire he was leaving with every caress of his hands, the all to delicious taste of him, was almost too much to bear. Slowly, ever so cautiously he nudged her mouth open a little more. Shocking both him and her she made the first move. Gentle nibbling on his lower lip and then grazing her tongue on the roof of his mouth. He moaned at the new sensation and pulled her closer. The material of her shirt now wrinkled in his hands. One of her hands moved into his hair dying to feel the softness of it. She was pulling at him, wanting, begging for more, anything. Her whole body was ready to explode and the catalyst was the man before her. S he had never enjoyed kissing as much as she did with him at that moment. Finally, he pulled away. His sole reason was so he could breathe. He didn’t want to pull away, and when he did he moaned when he could still taste her on his lips. She tasted perfect to him, like the sweetest candy. He wanted more. His body was dying for more. He wouldn’t take it that far. Kissing her was enough to drive him crazy anything else might get him committed. He brushed a stray hair out of her face and gently kissed the top of her nose. “Faith?” he asked resting his forehead against hers, still trying regain his breath. “Yeah?” “We’re gonna have to do A LOT more of that.” “Definitely, do.. definitely a lot more….” Chapter
Fourteen
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