This site exists for one reason: To show you and your dog-obsessed friends that owning a dog is stupid. Why? Several reasons follow, in no particular order. If your mind is too retarded to grasp these concepts, then go make love to your dog, stupid ass.

• You have to clean up their shit.
• If they bite someone, you're libel.
• You have to groom them.
• You have to take them for a walk every day, regardless of the weather.
• They're expensive. The average cost of owning a dog over a lifetime of 10 years is $6,400. Wouldn't that money be better spent on your child's education, a nice vacation, a gift for your wife, self-pampering, or anything else that has true worth? And who knows what serious health-related issues will come up? They get worms and have other unpredictable—and costly—health problems. And what about obedience classes? Cha-ching!
• They're dirty and unsanitary. Not only do they sometimes pee and shit in the house, but they also lick their own crotch, then lick you. How appetizing is that? Also, when they're peeing, they often miss and tinkle on their legs and feet, tracking significant amounts of urine into the house. Dogs are also sloppy eaters, splashing water and food everywhere, and they slobber on everything from your face to your bed pillow.
• Most dogs shed, creating a perpetual mess, with hair accumulating in virtually every crevice of the house.
• They're loud when they bark, and they disrupt the peace of the neighborhood unless you muzzle them.
• They interrupt peaceful moments.
• They're unpredictable. No matter how friendly a dog is, it can turn on the owner and possibly injure or kill your child. And many breeds are genetically inclined to attack. Not to mention that even “nice” dogs play rough, which is a risk to small children.
• They usually bother guests, especially if the guest doesn't like dogs or if they have an allergy to pets.
• They're a time suck. Every moment spent with a dog is a moment away from someone you love. Sure, you can include family members and significant others in dog activities. But is that really quality time spent on strengthening family and romantic relationships?
• They don't really give you “unconditional love,” as so many people seem to think. They just act affectionate based on conditioned response. They know you're going to feed them, pet them, etc. Those are the only reasons they act as if they're your “best friend.” Again, DOGS ARE NOT PEOPLE.
• Some dogs are big and clumsy, knocking over and breaking fragile stuff.
• They're destructive. Leave some dogs alone, and they'll trash your house or car. Remember “Turner & Hooch”?
• You have to transport them in your car. Why spend all that money on a good car, only to have a dog ruin the interior?
• They're a hazard in the car. Not only do they distract you from driving (especially if they're loud and running around), but they are dangerous projectiles in an accident if they're not properly harnessed.
• For some dogs, you need a fenced-in yard. Fences are expensive to install, not to mention that the dog will shit freely to its heart's content. Would you rather have a nice clean yard for your kids, or have a dog create an unsanitary shit minefield? And have you ever tried to clean up a yard filled with shit after it rains?
• They're annoying. They never let you eat in peace without begging relentlessly, and some will follow you around the house no matter where you go.
• Rabies: All outdoor dogs have a danger of contracting this serious viral disease.
• Most dogs get fleas.
• Someone has to watch the dog when you go on vacation.
• They smell, no matter how clean you keep them.