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The Story So Far...................................... A long long time ago, in a galaxy far far away............. ooops, wrong story......
In the early 1800's a baby boy was brought forth into this world aboard the decks of the Woolwich ferry, Strange enough in its own right i hear you say, why would somewhere like Woolwich have its own ferry?????? anyway, as i was saying, this baby boy was named by his mother as Thomas William Carter Caxton Ford. Due to being born mid Thames young Tommy was not allowed a British passport and due to having no way to claim the dole started out in many failed careers such as Art glazing, lumber yard night watchman, spiv, wide boy, Cinema Technician, Estate Agent and Market Trader. as each of these failed he had no option but to turn to a life of crime and join the Met. This too failed when he was dismissed for nearly solving a real crime instead of issuing tickets to innocent coachmen.
This was Tommy's big break in life, first in 1856 he met his wife Mrs Tommy on the ward of a Tuberculosis Sanatorium. Then was offered a job as Professor of Physics at Exeter University by convincing the local council that he was an asylum seeker who spoke no English, had 4 wives, 24 kids and 17 other relatives who were being persecuted because his home country was too hot and dusty for him. (he also received £600 a week, a new house, car and the right not to obey any British laws on religious grounds)
Whilst teaching at Exeter University Prof. Tommy perfected the art of cloning, and soon turned it into a lucrative business supplying a never ending stream of clones to various governments for use as Soldiers, Test Pilots, Violinists, Keyboard Players etc. At the same time Mrs Tommy discovered the secret of halting the aging process by living on a diet of nothing but mashed brussel sprouts and out of date muffins. They both live to this day in a secret government installation somewhere in the south.
There have been occasional news reports about cloning experiments, but our investigative reporters have unearthed a huge number of photographs from all over the globe proving that Prof Tommy and his clones are among us. His most prolific times in the last century were during world war 2 when Prof Tommy was duped into a contract with an Austrian house painter to provide 200,000 clones in storm trooper outfits for some "big redecorating job" in France. And the other embarrassing time for Prof Tommy was when he sold a load of malfunctioning reject clones to some Saudi millionaires son for " some Jee-something or other in the desert"
These clones are still among us. Maybe you have seen one? Maybe you have one working with you? Maybe there is one at this very moment selling your house, working in your local cinema, clearing your guttering, laying a wonky patio, chopping down your tree? we want to know. Please report any sightings or photographs to this site. We will not stop until the whole world knows about the peril that is.....
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For Pictures from 1850 to 1939 |
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For Pictures from 1945 to Present | |
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For Pictures from The War Years |
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My Midi Pages | |
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For Pictures of Prof Tommys Cloned Family & Friends | |||
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For The Most Wanted Page (May be offensive to some) | |||
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Coming soon ~ Loads more Midis, Clones, Family Pics, Insults, Links and anything else you want me to put here. |
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Disclaimer- The contents of this site are for humourous intent only. It is not meant to offend or upset anyone, with the exception of certain terrorist supporting cowards and hypocrites (you know who you are, and so does George W Bush -ha ha). If you are offended easily then proceed no further and click here All material used on this site is sourced locally or donated by third parties and copyright free. If you wish to use any material from this site you may do so only after receiving consent from the site owners. If any material contained is legally copyrighted to yourself then please us and we shall remove it promptly.
Copyright 2002. Delta IT Services. All Rights Reserved
What are you doing all the way down here? all the good stuff is at the top of the page