A Harry Potter slightly crossed
insanity fan fiction
Started 24 January 2005
Completed -
pending
Last revised 5
October 2007
Reason – minor
correction and new chapter
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all associated characters are
the property Ms. Rowling’s and are used without permission. This fan-fiction isn’t intended for
commercial use but is rather a tribute to the Harry Potter universe. This fan fiction imports the active and
concluding elements (but not the characters or storylines) of the (Japanese
Anime) Ranma ½ and Tenchi crossover fan fiction ‘The Virus’ by Chris Jones (http://www.furinkan.net/fanfic/virus.txt ) or FF-net story ID 93246.
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Wandless Magic By Cloud Dreamer
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Prologue
- A Virus
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Hermione
stared at the television in shock as the frantic news reporter explained the
unusual aspects of the airborne pandemic that had spread from
She
was distracted as her mother sneezed violently several times. “Mum, you ok?”
“Yes,
honey,” Jane Granger replied, “we must have picked up a cold or something from
the dental conference we just got back from.
One of the Japanese representatives seemed to become ill at the end
there.”
“Japanese?”
squeaked Hermione as she worriedly glanced back at the TV.
Her
mother’s answer was lost in a series of increasingly violent sneezes that ended
when brunette Jane abruptly transformed into a taller blond male.
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Chapter One - A meeting of minds or a mindless meeting?
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Dumbledore
laid his glasses on the table and wearily massaged his temples as he sought to
relieve his aching head. Tiredly he
glanced around the large horseshoe shaped table set up in the great hall of
Hogwarts. He sat at the head of the
table and various members of his staff were sitting to his immediate left while
on the far left side of the large table were gathered the Minister of Magic and
a dozen of his senior aides. On the
Headmaster’s right side were assembled various leaders of the magical
community, many of whom just happened to also be members of the Order of the
He
sighed and then flared his magical aura in an effort to start the meeting. The noise abated as everyone’s attention
focused on the Headmaster. Albus smiled,
the twinkle in his blue eyes dancing madly as he asked the medi-witch
standing at the podium in the open arch of the horseshoe table, “Madame
Pomfrey, can you please summarize the history and effects of this new virus if
you would?”
“Of
course Headmaster,” she paused then began in a somewhat lecturing mode; “The wizarding world has few magical maladies, Lycanthropy being
the most widely known though most children do experience wizards flu at one
time or another. The magical element for
this newly discovered virus originated at Jusenkyo . . .”
She
was cut off as Minister of Magic Fudge stood up and yelled, “Rubbish! Everyone
knows that that is nothing more than a myth.
This has to be something that ‘he-who-must-not-be-named’ has done.”
Her
lips white with a repressed scorn, Pomfrey hissed, “My word Minister, I did not
realize that you were an expert in medicine as well as everything else.”
Fudge
flushed in rage at the verbal slap but before he could continue, a young
ministerial aide by the name of Percy reminded his boss, “Sir, ah, it is policy
that ‘he-who-must-not-be-named’ isn’t mentioned.”
A
scattering of chuckles around the table prompted Fudge to sit again after a
brief glare at the pompous aide.
“As
I was saying before being so rudely interrupted, Jusenkyo magic is inherent to
this new virus. For those who are
unfamiliar with this somewhat rare magical element I will provide a brief
description. It is the residue of a
large magical battle that occurred about four thousand years ago. The battle was a five sided one with goblin
warlocks contesting a mythril mine against dwarven mages while vampires using blood magic and the now
extinct magical metallic dragons were against everybody. Unfortunately the mine was beneath one of the
ancient towns of the elder elves before they left this realm. As if the mixture of these five dissimilar magics was not bad enough, the battle site was over a nexus
of planetary Ley-lines.” She paused to take a brief sip of water and
to allow her words to be assimilated.
“Continuing,”
she stated, “the merging of this strange mixture of magics enchanted the mythril ore
to produce an unusual curse.
Unfortunately the battle shattered the mines and caused them to become
permanently flooded as sources for enchanted springs; an enchantment that has
been maintained ever since by the power of the Ley-lines.” She sighed and added, “The enchantment
created hundreds of small springs, each is uniquely cursed to cause anyone or
any being who is immersed in the waters of that spring to become transformed
into the physical form of the last being to have drowned in that spring. The curse is activated by cold water and
temporarily negated by hot water. Every
hundred years or so an effort is made to mask the springs from the muggle world
but the magic of the springs is so chaotic that all wards fail within days of
being cast. Unfortunately the very
chaotic nature of this mixed magic also makes the curse incurable and immune to
all known magic.”
She
sighed and explained, “That is the history of the magic source. Normally its effects are only local to the area
of the springs and those who fall into them, but somehow an alien virus was
mutated with this magic and is now being spread world wide. The alien part of the virus unfortunately
renders muggle medicine ineffective while the chaotic nature of the curse magic
prevents magical warding against the now magical virus.” She looked around and explained, “The initial
symptoms are mildly flu like, usually including a slight fever and sniffles. Unfortunately, by the time these symptoms
appear, the person has been contagious to those around him for at least 12
hours. Eventually, usually several days to a week later, the victim will begin
to sneeze with progressing violence. The
sneezes will end only after the first gender transformation has occurred. Initially the change will be locked for a
period of several days or weeks depending on several factors including the age
of the patient. It should be noted that
the younger the patient, the faster the virus effects proceed. Once the virus has run its course, the change
in most cases is controlled by the application of hot or cold water. There are rare cases where the gender change
is random - being set for the day upon wakening each morning and even rarer,
the change is controlled solely by the will of the person.”
She
paused a moment and then added with a wry grin, “There were literally hundreds
of potential transformation curses at Jusenkyo.
The virus could be causing those affected to transform into pigs, cats,
pandas, ducks . . . well, you get the idea.
Fortunately, the virus-curse is limited to only a gender
transformation.” She looked out into the
shocked faces facing her, “In summary, if you get the virus, it will cause you
to change sex with cold water. It cannot
be cured, it’s being spread worldwide and I do not know of any wards that can
prevent its spread.”
The
excited babble of fearful and angry voices died off as a soft chuckle seemed to
cut across it.
“Remus?” questioned Albus, “Is there something funny about
this situation?”
“Yep!”
the graying werewolf snickered, “It seems that the virus is a partial cure for
Lycanthropy.” Seeing the astounded faces
glaring at him he explained, “There are were-folk in
“TREASON!”
yelled several ministerial representatives simultaneously.
“Bull!”
Remus replied, “You forbid us from holding jobs,
marrying or having children but you sure as hell are not going to prevent us
from being cured!” He grinned widely,
fangs showing, “Besides, our new forms are no longer bound to those legal
limitations either.”
A
sinister laugh drew their attention to another ‘dark’ creature. Demitri, a well
known elder vampire reputed to be a hunter of vampire hunters softly observed,
“While this virus has no affect on my peoples, we are amused by its
affects. I confess that some of the
‘unruly’ elements of my peoples have assisted in its spread.”
A
gaily dressed and somewhat foppish man stood up. Seeing as he had their attention he lisped,
“Nor are they the only ones. While most
of the world sees this virus as a curse, those of the transgender, gay and
lesbian communities see this as a blessing of unimaginable proportions.” He sat down to a shocked silence.
Alastor Moody stood with a heavy clump of his wooden
leg drawing attention to himself. “There
are worse problems,” he grumped. He
rocked over to where Madame Pomfrey had stood and began to explain. “This damned magic can’t be hidden from the muggles and our whole world is on the verge of being
exposed.”
“Preposterous!”
snarled Fudge, “If you weren’t already retired, I’d fire you for that
incompetent comment.”
Moody
smiled, a sight not for the faint of heart considering his scars. He mused aloud, “I wonder if you will be a
squib when the virus hits you?” Fudge
sat down, shock freezing his tongue. “I
was in contact with some of the unspeakables from the
Japanese MoM. They have discovered that a person’s magical
inheritance and powers are governed by genes that just happen to be on the X
and Y chromosomes.” Seeing their
confusion, he snickered, “Your magical genes are sex linked!”
“Ah
shit!” Everyone’s eyes swiveled in disbelief to Madame Pomfrey. She blushed brightly but explained, “If what Alastor is saying is true, then that means your magical
signature could dramatically change when you do.”
“Gets
worse,” the old warrior gruffly added.
“There’s been enough Japanese folk affected that significant trends can
be mapped. In the normal magical
population, almost 10 percent will become squibs; purebloods get off a bit
easier at half that or 5 percent. Of
course the reverse is true in the muggle population. Muggles that have a
magical kin such as a child or cousin have a 10 percent chance of gaining
magical powers. Squibs have almost a
50-50 chance of that as well. The
general muggle population though has only about seven in ten-thousand chance of
being affected magically which means there could be about four million new
untrained muggle-born witches and wizards if the so called Nerima virus
continues to spread.” He sighed and
added, “The very worse effect though is magical. It seems that in the same way the curse
removes the magical affect of were-wolves, it also erases past magic affects if
they are lingering in nature.” Seeing
that most of them didn’t understand he explained, “When someone undergoes the
gender transformation, it removes all previous lingering magic. That means it cancels out an Imperio curse, or a memory charm or a love potion or a
healing spell as well.” He added, “Well,
only if the healing spell is recent. Only the lingering magic effects are
negated.”
“Muggles?” whispered McGonagall. “Does that mean that all the memory charms
that have been done over the years will become undone?”
“Yep,”
Moody grunted, “and it’s already causing havoc.
Let’s say that some less than honorable magical folk have been stealthy executed
by armed neighbors that have suddenly remembered raped daughters and other such
things.” He sneered at the minister, “It
suddenly seems the magical government is being called on the carpet for how
poorly it has policed itself recently.”
Fudge
blanched at the idea of millions of irate armed muggles
after his head. His attention was caught
by a widely grinning goblin. “What the
hell are you grinning at?” he snarled.
“Oh,
I was just thinking of some of the more, ah, ‘pureblood’ edicts that you have
recently forced on the British wizarding world,” the
goblin sneered.
Fudge
started to snarl a reply when his face lost all color. “NO, I won’t allow
that. I am my family heir.”
“Not
when you become female you won’t be,” the goblin sing-songed
with almost a hint of glee. “By the way,
just for information, goblins are not affected by the virus.”
“Nor
are centaurs,” interjected Frenize.
Dumbledore
noticed the puzzled look on Hagrid’s face, “Hagrid, do you have something to add?”
“No
sar,” the half-giant muttered. He scratched his head and muttered loudly,
“Was just thinking ‘bot tha
centaurs. Makes sense da aft end woun’t be changed by ta virus since tis a horse, but I’hm shor glad ta front end ain’t either.
Might be strange to see ah stallion with a woman’s bit’s up front ya
know?”
Frenize’s was not the only face to turn greenish at
that thought.
“Albus?”
Dumbledore
turned to his left and arched an eyebrow in question to the head of the Ravenclaw house, “Yes Filius? You have a question?”
“Not
really,” the short man replied, “It just occurred to me that Luna’s father had
port-keyed from
Remus walked over and held out a hand to the height
impaired professor who was now sitting on the floor, “What say we go get a few
butter-beers while you sneeze my way a few times?”
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Author’s
note: The Jusenkyo creation explanation
is total fabrication on my part as an exercise of my imagination since it isn’t
explained in the Ranma sources.
C
& C to cloud_dreamer2000@yahoo.com
Web-page
http://www.geocities.com/cloud_dreamer2000
Additional
fan-fiction can be found on my web page
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