Not a day for boxing

I was excited about being in London on Boxing Day, and so to celebrate I planned a sparring session with a friend, but it didn't work out, so we had lunch instead and threatened to kick each other's asses another day. I was disappointed, because I assumed that on Boxing Day people took to the shops and boxed each other over sale items. When I went to Oxford Circus later that day, I found that Londoners are too civilized to do that, and besides, there was nothing left worth fighting over, even at The Apple Store.

Most of the high streets, or shopping areas, were jam-packed with shoppers. I took a nice walk from Islington down to Leicester Square, where amusement rides were set up, and then to Piccadilly Circus and on to Carnaby Street in Soho. An American couple asked me how to get to Leicester Square from Carnaby. I later realized I'd told them the wrong street, though I did point them in the right direction. That's the risk of asking a non-native. I must walk purposefully or something, because at least three people have asked me for directions in London. As a New Yorker I've perfected the skill of bluffing, a demeanor that says "I know exactly where I'm going" even if I haven't got a clue. This stems from a fear I developed in 1980s crack-ridden New York of never looking like I don't fit in. I will never, for instance, whip out a map in a tourist area to find out where I am. I'd sooner duck into a men's room at McDonald's to do that. But then, as I've demonstrated, even asking someone directions isn't always the best answer.

The appropriately named Oxford Circus was a crush of shoppers, jamming places like Mango, Ted Baker, and French Connection UK. An friend of mine said I had to go to Topshop and its men's department, Topman, where "Americans in the know" shop. So I went to Topman, and after an exhausting search for something breathable not made for a 12-year-old's body, I decided I was not the right demographic. In Topshop the air was abuzz with talk of Kate Moss's new line for the store. That should have been a tipoff. So thanks, but I will remain an American in the I-don't-know.

Brits are bemused that in America only Christmas and New Year's Day are holidays. Despite the shopping madness, London virtually shuts down from Christmas Eve through the day after New Year's. Boxing Day is a bank holiday, like Christmas, but its origin seems to have been lost. I asked native Brits why they commemorated Boxing Day. "I don't know really," one friend said, "I suppose it has something to do with packages."

"Hmm, I never really thought about it," said another. "I just watch the games on telly. Pass the crisps and a black and tan, if you don't mind."