| Last Updated - 31 MAY 2007 |
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| Who needs Return of the Sith when you could have Richard Gere Solid? Well, I do actually. |
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| Richard Gere Solid III E3 Show Press Conference! |
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| At yesterday's E3 Show 2005, Producer/Director Mr. Daal unveiled Daal Games and Good Dowa Industries upcoming title 'Richard Gere Solid 3: The Sons of Little Cheese', the third and final chapter of the intrepid Richard Gere Solid Video game series. |
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| Good old Codecs are still here. |
| Now you can bet on horse racing! |
| Mr. Daal confirmed what many local and worldwide press office's suspected, that Charlie Sheen will indeed reprise his role as the game's protagonist. Daal also informed us of the wide range of voices that will be on 'show' in RGS3, including voice talents old and new. "Oh yes, we will see the return of many of out established actors from previous games and hopefully we will have some new additions too!, |
| We have been charged with the task of bringing back classic characters such as Charlie and Martin Sheen, Bill Cosby and the newly titled Francesca Castle. There are also new characters to think about, including the Terrorist leader Terrance Stamp aka Placid Queen, and one of his vile henchmen The Most Polite Badguy in the World Ever." |
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| Stunningly rendered carpets! |
| Moreover, Mr. Daal was keen to underline the specific new gameplay elements involved in the final entry of the series. "There will be four new major gameplay elements for players to get to grips with. First, there's the food system. Players must eat to improve their stats so that they can beat the badguys. Secondly, there's the clothing system, where players must buy all kinds of various garments to get them into different places and situations." The Reporter had to bribe Daal with a pint before they could milk the information from his ample teets. "One of the biggest new features of RGS3 will be the patrol system. Prior to this game, the series has never really lived up to the tagline 'Tactical Espionage Goings-On' but now, that's all changed... kind of. Well, it's not all that tactical, and the espionage is okish... but I tell you what, there is one HELL of a lot of goings-on!" |
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| The seedy areas of Cheadle, England. |
| His answers were cryptic and we could tell he wanted to keep tight lipped regarding the project but we pressed and pressed for more golden nuggats of info and came up trumps. "The fourth and arguably the biggest new feature is the inclusion of the 'Personality Meter' which narrowly missed out on being implemented into Richard Gere Solid 2. Here, the player will dicate what kind of man Charlie Sheen Dancing Queen becomes and towards the end of the game, the decisions the player has made could make a big difference on the final outcome." The Reporter craftily managed to steal a few free promotional CDs and we have uploaded the removable media here. By this we mean screenshots. |
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| Good evening. |
| While details are sparse on the game that is tipped to be the '2006 Game of the Year' and the 'Feel Good Hit of the Summer'. we do know this: It will still be carefully constructed using Good Dowa Industries illustrious game engine 'Drunken Love 2D'. That's right folks, it will still be rendered in full, stunning 2D graphics, only this time they will be new, improved and more polished than ever before. |
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| Looks so real you might get confused and think it is. |
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| Tom Berenger and Charlie Sheen unveil RGS3 at the E3 show, yesterday. |
| "RGS3 looks like my new wife's arse," Daal claimed, "And by that I mean smooth and improved. It runs at a much higher resolution that previous games in the series and is now supported by full colour depth and MP3 quality music and sound effects." Troy Tempest, loyal reporter of the... urm.. Reporter, has been a long time fan of the comedic video game series and had this to say: "Fucking get in!" When asked about the truth in the rumour that this will be the last game in the Richard Gere Solid series, Daal replied with, "Yes, at least for now anyway. Richard Gere Solid will be returning in some way shape or form, be it with or without the seemingly indestructable anal browneye pirate that is Richard Gere." All of us here at the Reporter wait with baited breath but we aren't literally holding our breath as RGS3 has been slated for a Spring 2006 release date. But when that hot little CD lands in your palms next spring, make sure you keep an eye out for none other than the Reporter's very own Steve McTavish playing a role in the game. I feel so warm inside! - Steve McT. |
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| Hammil gives it the 'Thumbs up (your ass) Award' for 2005/6. |
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| BREAKING NEWS |
| Following story from - 18 MAY 2005 |
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| Steve McTavish 1952-2007 |
| Breaking news from BBC Spotlight Cornwall suggests that Steve McTavish was killed in a car crash on 32st May 2007, 18:21 BST. This news has come as a shock to all close to Steve, and to the loyal staff at the Camborne Reporter. Our condolences go out to his only remaining family - his father, Jock McTavish. Steve was a pillar of Cornish society, supplying the local area all the scandals they could ever want or need. His last few years he spent in regret, not being able to update his beloved Camborne Reporter and it took a toll on his health. He will be sorely missed. |
| ADDITIONAL BREAKING NEWS - This just in... whilst sweeping the crime scene, police were alarmed to notice that Mr. McTavish's body was STOLEN from his recked Volkswagen GTI. The Local Constabulary are reported to have been shitting one large. More developmets as they come... |