The Story
      You've spent the past year hiding out within the safe confines of a controlled atmosphere, aka your air-conditioned home, when you finally decide to run outside. Just as you are running outside the light hits your eyes and your pupils all but disappear. As you're fighting off this attack, more deadly UV lights impale your flesh. Man, the sun is a real jerk.
 
 
 

Advantages
     Okay fine, without the sun everything around the world would cease to exist. The sun gives light to the plants so we can have both oxygen and food. Well, blah blah blah. Come who cares about stupid things like oxygen. I mean there are other perfectly good gasses out there. All we have to do is learn how to live off of nitrogen and we'd be set for life. Sure all plant life would die as well as everything in the oven, but big deal. So we'd get rid of vegetarians, boo hoo.

     The sun also reacts with our flesh to release Vitamin D throughout our body. Even though I'm not sure how it works or what it does I do know that we can just get it from a bottle of milk. So instead of spending an hour outside, you can just drink a glass of milk and call it good.

    The sun also gives us light, and shines brilliantly upon us. Try a row of fluorescence. But what of the empathic and poetic light that controls peoples moods. I guess there's just really no way to deal with it. Sorry.

Disadvantages
    For starters this little thing known as melanoma. The sun beats down relentlessly never caring whom it destroys in its path just so it can give off some energy. In any court of law that would be considered deadly behavior. But here the sun is celebrated. Bah, without the sun we would never have to worry about skin cancer or sunburns. Can't you imagine how wonderful life would be without having to worry about turning as red as a lobster. Sure it'd be so cold out you'd never want to go outside much less long enough to get burnt, but still.

     Another problem with the sun is how warm and inviting it makes the outdoors. For the love of God, I don't have time to gout outside and frolic in the great outdoors. I have to finish a twenty page paper and somehow pull a review out of my butt. See, this sun thing just makes it that much more of a pain.
 

Final Point
Despite all of my proof, displays, and whining, I haven't even been able to convince myself that the sun is bad. So, I suppose we'd better just keep the dang thing.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

The sun is just mooching on all of the poems and songs written about it, I say we should see if the thing lives up to all of its hype.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Why, why did mankind have to invent the musical? Was it some kind of a beery dare? If so, can we please make them stop?
 
 

Water the building blocks of life, right? Well, that doesn't mean it's something that's really all that important or necessary now does it.